Hold On!!!

I am a very happy person in all ramifications (no faking). I am not happy because have got so much money, I am not happy because have got any fame. I am just usually happy for divine health and peace of mind but somethings hurt my peace of mind so much tears drop from my eyes whenever I try to think. A lot of questions that I don't seem to find answers to run through my mind like a stream.

I ask myself questions like, why was I born into a country like this? I am tired of trying, those that are making it, do they have two heads? Why am I not getting answers to my prayers? Am I doing anything wrong? How did my life turn out to be this dry? Is anybody also facing so much depression like me? Would anybody even believe a happy person like me is usually frustrated? Who else do I turn to for help? Everyday the future seems uncertain, what does the future really holds? Is there even going to be any future? Who is going to be there for me if I say these things out? Lastly, who cares?

Going on and on about this questions without getting any form of answer. I tend to comfort myself with the fact that all the things we prayed for yesterday are the things we have now and the things we are praying for today, are the things we would possess tomorrow. Therefore, when there is life, there is hope...I tell myself and I am telling anyone out there, hold on...Help is on the way😄...

A Strong Person💪💪💪 (A hope for somebody out there!!!)

I have seen people define who a strong person is times without number and I don't think I quiet agree totally with any of these definitions. One of these definitions is, "people who are strong go through a lot of things and don't ever say a word about them". Well, I have my own sentiment about this particular definition. Not like it is not correct but I think it is not complete.

If you tell me a strong person can be determined by how well that person keeps and privatize all the messy things around him or her. You sure haven't told me the public perception of that person. I would like to know if this person is always feeling all beat up and like though he or she is carrying the whole problem of this world but still manages to maintain a smile or the person is all bitter and quiet because he or she is trying to be strong.

If you would ask me, I would like to modify everybody's perception about a strong person. You don't have to be a bitter person because you are being strong. You don't have to be a super "withdrawn from the world" kind of person because you are being strong. You don't have to be a sadist because you are being strong.

And somebody in one corner is about to ask me how the heck do I expect someone who is going through a lot to be an all smile and lively person. Well, I don't know how exactly but I think the best way is to see every problem as a temporary thing and a challenge you have to face for you to get on the brighter side of life. Although, everyone these days tend to be faking happiness until you hear that someone somewhere killed his or herself due to a long time suffering from depression. All I can say is, it is very OK to cry, it is very OK to long for another person who would tell you not to worry that everything would be fine also seek genuine happiness in the best way you can and you would find it.

So I am going to wrap up with this, "A strong person goes through a lot, either keeps quiet about everything or seek advice from somebody worthy, cry in his or her closet (not compulsory though), gets up to fight back, gets up to try again and still manages to live a happy life not to please the world but to satisfy his or herself".

Burnt Plaintain

"This browsing of a thing will not kuku finish me😂..."

Ok, this is practically something I want to gist you about. This faithful day, I was so engrossed and carried away with what I was doing online (what was I even doing🤔? It would be something meaningful though) that I had to excuse myself from the kitchen where my mum was preparing lunch for us. Wait, let me tell you very little about my mum, my mum is a very caring and kind person that can give anybody anything in her possession plus she even goes out of her way to satisfy others.

So this very day, my mum was frying plaintain, after packing the first bowl, she realized she needed to buy something at the grocery store close to our house. She poured the second bowl of plaintain which is the last batch on fire, she then told me to keep watch that she would be right back. Immediately she left, I went to check the frying plaintain and it was not ready yet but almost so I left it to return back to what I was doing on my phone.

After about fifteen minutes, I suddenly remembered I was asked to watch plaintain, I jumped up and ran to the kitchen but on getting there, smoke was everywhere and the whole plaintain was burnt. I immediately did not know what to do because I knew my mum would soon get back.

I checked round the kitchen and saw that there was just one raw plaintain remaining from the whole bunch and it was not as ripe as the rest. I however peeled off the back, sliced it as fast as possible, mixed it with a little bit of sugar and salt then fried it very fast. I cleaned everywhere as quickly as I could and added the new batch of plaintain to the one my mum had fried. I then poured the burnt one in a nylon and hid it in my room😄 (dumb or smart?😀).

My mum came back, thanked me for watching over the plaintain and frying it successfully😂 and I was there saying "thank you ma" with a divided mind. Although, I continued with the remaining activities of the day normally as I should but my conscience just didn't stop pricking me.

Few hours after lunch, I made up my mind to say the truth because it was as though I was during in silence all through so I was lucky my mum came over to my room to give me a message. I then said;

"mummy, I have something to tell you hope you won't get angry? "

She then said with a smile, " Ok, I promise I won't get angry"

I sighed and started telling her how the story of the plantain went. Although she corrected me to always pay attention whenever I am cooking but she never got angry. As a result, I was able to say the truth and free my mind/conscience at the same time😀. I hope you were able to learn one or two things from this. You can as well let me/others know what you learnt by commenting below in the comment section. Thank you for your time, I love you😘

"My Mum and Siblings have already accepted me for who I am" _ Fashion Fanatic/Philantropist, Raymond

*     My name is Olagbende Rebecca also known as RBK, can I meet you?

My name is Olawole Falope aka Raymond.

*     So, the name @therealbabyboyforlife you bear on instagram, was it coined from Raymond or just a name for the gram?

It was coined as a result of my lifestyle.

*     What is this lifestyle if I may ask?

My traveling, Shopping and Philanthropist lifestyle.

*     I want to ask, do you mind sharing your educational/family background?

Yeah sure, I went to Straitgate Nursery and Primary School in Magodo, also went to Lindsey Primary School at Igbon Efon then at primary 5, I switched to Ebenezery Height. I did my secondary school at Distinct Medal College, Magodo afterwards, I wrote jamb and enrolled at the Nigerian Institute of Journalism then I did dLI at Unilag before finally enrolling at Ohio State University.

*     Wow, That's a lot, u are a really educated somebody😁

Lol, thanks hun.

*     You are so welcome 😊, so how about your family/background?

I'm the first of 4kids.

*     Okay...

My dad is late so all I have is just my mum, siblings and God.

*     Awwww, so sorry about that🙏 . Following the family/background question, your looks😁 (Chaii) attracts/draw almighty attention, you know, anyone that sees you would be like, "maybe he is an hairstylist", "maybe he is a MakeUp artist" and what have you😃, so I want to ask if you are into the fashion business, music business, modelling business or better still, what is the inspiration behind your looks?

I'm a Model, Actor and a fashion designer.

*     Very cool...So how does mum and siblings react to the whole swag thing?

They don't have a problem with it as they've all accepted me for who I am.

*     That is applaudable, Ok let us come to strangers now, how do people react when they see you, do they ask questions like, are gay or something? Then how do you often react?

Some people are receptive while some say are you a guy or a girl. Some say "are you gay?" 😂. I give them instant replies because my mouth gat no chill.

*     😆😆😆

I clear them straight away and let them know I'm not gay that it's just my style. My hair and looks are my signature. Same way some Footballers, Artistes and Models have certain looks.

*     Therefore, we can say, you are straight, you do girls and not guys🤣 and the looks and all is just for the signature and lifestyle? So on behalf of the All Girls Association AGA😁, I would like to ask if you are still single?

Yessssssss and Yes I'm still Single.

*     Am sure girls would start applying once they read this interview😁

Lol 😂 😂 😂 😂

*     Ok back to serious matters, got to know you have a Charity Foundation, can you shed more light on it please?

I started it last year after my 24th birthday. It is to cater for the less privileged in rural areas who have no access to the good life.

*     Hmmmn, a nice scheme, may God continue to enrich your pocket🙏

Amen🙏

*     I also got to know you auditioned for the 2019 Big Brother Nigeria Reality TV show, how was the audition first of all?

It was stressful.

*     Eyaah, but you auditioned at last?

No, I did not, I left angrily. The stress was too much.

*     Ouuuuch!!! People were already hoping to see you in the house including me.

Yeah, I know right but I had to save my life and brand. The environment was not conducive for me. They started spraying tear gas on people and some started choking and vomiting. Some people even fainted in the process. I could not endure such treatment so I had to leave.

*     What was your motivate behind wanting to be part of the reality show?

I believe it is a great platform to showcase my brand which is also an added advantage for them as I'd be giving them more ratings and views.

*     So what words do you have for anyone out there silently or openly looking up to you?

Be yourself and don't care what people say about you. Grow a tough skin. Else if you keep throwing stones at every dog that barks you'd never get to your destination and you'd be depressed.

*     Hmmmn that is one good advice no one should forget 🤔 but one question pls, do you still plan to venture into this cross-dressing thing like Bobrisky, Denrele Edun, and the likes?

Looooool No way! Though I don't have anything against them as it's their life and people should be allowed to do whatever pleases them or rock their boat.

*     Yea just like a friend of mine would say "Every Mallam with him own Kettle" 😁

Yes ooo

*     And also where do you see yourself, your foundation and your career in the next five to ten years?

I see myself on Forbes list rubbing shoulders with the likes of Mark Zuckerberg and Bill Gate.

*     Very nice💯✅ Okay we have come to the end of this interview, I want to say a very big thank you for granting this interview, may God continue to bless you🙏 Then your Instagram and Twitter Handles so anyone with a personal question can contact you.

You're welcome...Amen and you too dear. Instagram: @therealbabyboyforlife Twitter: @Raymondsplash

"Am Cooking a New Hit..."4LOW", Better than MANYA" - Afropop Artiste, Nafey

Download, Listen and Enjoy MANYA_Nafey ft Judesongz

*     Can I meet you please?

   I am Ojo Victor popularly known as *NAFEY*, *MANYANIFIED NAFEY*,  I had my secondary School education at Federal Government College, Idoani, before proceeding to AAU Akungba where I was awarded Bsc Microbiology.

*     For you, is Music inbuilt or something you developed?

   I see it as a gift cause I find it very very easy to compose, and I grew up listening to Michael Jackson, so...

*     How and When did you start as a Music Artiste?

   Have been writing songs since way back, even since my junior school days.

*     As a Music Artiste,how has it been so far and do you just sing during your leisure hours for pleasure or you are a full-time Musician?

   Am a full-time Musician, and I love writing songs as I breathe.

*     What else do you do apart from Music?

   Well, music first, I studied Microbiology, we don't know what the future have in hands for us, I may decide to have a clinic or laboratory and sing along side, am into Real estate management as an agent too.

*     What perception about music generally do you want to change in this modern day society that we live in? And what innovations are you planning to bring into the Music industry?

   Well, the Nigeria music industry is growing, thanks to the likes of DAVIDO and Wizkid they're really exporting and paving way for other artists but the only problem I see in the industry is this inferiority complex we have towards the European and American musicians, we always feel they're better than us and that's a fat lie, they're are very good at pop and RnB, and we are very good when it comes to ADM and Afrobeat, everybody na king on him lane.

*     What are the challenges you face as a Music Artiste that you think other artistes might also be facing? And what is your advice for fellow artistes on ways to tackle these challenges? Also your advice for upcoming Music Artistes and youth out there in general?

   I am facing the same problem every artiste faced while coming up, MONEY!!!. Lol. You know the music business needs a lot of investment and when ya just coming up not so many people wants to invest in your music or something. So I’d say FUNDS is the major problem, the talent is there but there is no way to put it out to the world.

*     What Genre of Music do you sing? And how many singles and collaborations have you been able to pull through so far,that is, recorded,produced,promoted...

   I do Afropop, Afro beat... I have many written singles some are not even out and *MANYA* is my biggest song till date recording over 17,000 downloads.

*     What Music project are you working on currently that you would want to give us insight about?
   Am already cooking a new hit for my salivating fans and good people who haven't known me but love good music, it's titled *4LOW*, better than *MANYA*,it's

going to give me new names like beast, lool...

*     Where do you see yourself in the next five to ten years?

   Lool, 5years?... Am a star, an unblown star... Lool... But very soon I will be a superstar by GOD's grace, *nafey* will be a house hold name and as for 5years time things being equal I should have a record label of my own.

*     How does anyone who would like to listen to your songs download them (The download links for your songs would also be available for download on the interview page); Then how would someone who wants to invite you for a show contact you? What are your Social Media handles like your Facebook page and Instagram ID, Twitter Handle?

   My song is all over, just google search _nafey manya_ , you can also Click and Download MANYA via this Link below;
Download, Listen and Enjoy MANYA_Nafey ft Judesongz
Also, follow @NafeyOjo on Instagram, then Ojo Victor Nafey on Facebook...

Olagbende Rebecca's Blog:  Thank you very much for granting an interview with you...May God give you more inspiration for More Excellent Music...

Nafey:   Thanks for having me here today, it's a pleasure...
GOD bless us all.
Ring out doubt.
Ring in believe.

And Behold!!!

We have all gone to bed at night when this terrible shooting started. I was so tired that very night that I went to bed so early which is very unusual of me. I woke up suddenly and ran to the sitting room, the whole family including my aunt, Aunty Sade and her son, Sile who happens to be my cousin (that were living with us), all looking terrified. It was then I knew that the shooting had started long before I woke up and that these robbers were moving from house to house. "Has nobody called the police?", I asked quietly. The eyes turned towards me in all the direction of the sitting room made me realize that the police are waiting to come after the match as usual.

Suddenly, we started hearing heavy footsteps approaching our front door. "They are coming already", I said with a shaky voice. Whereas, our house-help, Kudi was already half-dead even before the war started. Who would blame her, we were all afraid by the way and this was going to be our first experience of this total cruelty at that. That was how we heard the crooky voice "Open the door or we shatter it". Was that a request or a command, I thought in my head. Who will now open the door like this? I asked myself. Then I voiced out, "dad, go and open the door, you know you are our daddy", that was how my dad snapped back that I was being rude and that Akpan, our gateman should go and open the door. Akpan who had already gone to the toilet like five times answered and said, "Oga, you know say na gateman you employ me as no be security".

You would be wondering why Akpan was living with us rather than the boys quarters, this heavy rain fell and flooded the boy quarters including Akpan room so mum had to ask him to move in with us in the third guest room opposite where my aunty's and her son's room and adjacent Kudi's room. Back to the matter,  these people were still at the door while the whole drama of who would open the door erupted. That was when our door gave way just when Akpan was about pulling the knobs behind the door apart. Oh! What a heavy slap that thundered on Akpan's face from one higgedly-piggidly hand that was as dark as the beneath of Iya Risi's pot (our neighbour who lives in the next compound). I am sure you do not need me to tell you the way and manner at which Akpan fainted which left the rest of us to our fate.

These armed to the core men matched inside in alignment. They were so heavily built that they could easily pass for WWE champions if they ever register for the tournament. How did these ones get our address? I thought in my mind plus my voice was even shaky in my mind. That was when one of the men (the one who seemed to me to be the leader of the gang) asked with a very thick voice. "who rules here? " Nobody dared to answer not to talk of raise our heads up until we head the cork of a gun as the man asked again, "I said who mans here? " While I was still thinking if the "mans" in the thief's statement is grammatical correct, my dad quickly danced to the front in a circular motion shouting and singing at the same time that, "I am the daddy ooo". Who knew daddy could be this afraid after all the ways he usually shout at us. I can't wait to laugh after this whole episode, I thought to myself.

All of a sudden, Sile stood up and ran towards the open front door trying to escape. Did I remember to tell you that I have always known Sile to be a very foolish somebody? Back to my narration, a heavy-chested man followed suite and that was the end until the man came back and said to his boss with a very hard face that "I have silenced him". Yehhhhh!!! Who doesn't know what "I have silenced him means", Sile was dead in all ramifications. I began to shake because it was getting obvious that everything was beginning to become very messy.

On hearing that Sile is dead, my aunty, who was still pretending to be dead stood up and ran towards her room with this force that I never knew she could exhibit. We are going to lose a lot of people today, like mother like son, so foolish!!! I thought. Another man quickly followed her with a knife. Minutes after, this man came outside with a satisfied look and told his boss, "the job is done". In response, the boss said, "Our job is done here, this crazy people don't have anything, they just got our hands dirty unnecessarily, common let's go". The Armed robbers left with one swift movement and that was when my mum let out a loud cry "Iya oko mi ooo (that is, my sister-in-law ooo), where is Sile? She continued screaming.

We all went back to our various rooms with shaky feets. I was still even consoling my sister who was crying really hard when Aunty Sade came in like a miracle. We both jumped up immediately to hug her, she told us that she was not dead that she just hid in the room till the robbers left. We were so happy, my sister and I decided to go and inform the rest of the household about the miracle that just happened but Aunty Sade stopped us from going. She began giving us series of advices to be successful in life. She prayed and prayed for us. Let me tell you that, all my life, I have never seen my aunt to be this responsible. She then turned to speak with me privately, she said we all should not worry that Herself and Sile are in a better place now and I should make sure I take care of everybody especially her brother which is my dad on her behalf. I didn't quite understand what she was saying so I just looked on.

As if all the drama that happened that night was not enough, Aunty Sade said she would like to use our toilet that she doesn't want to go back to her room plus the fact that she would not be able to sleep alone now that Sile was gone. I sympathized with her and gave her a go ahead. That was when I head a knock at our door from mum and dad. I stood up to open for them while Aunty Sade hurried into the toilet. Mum and Dad were looking so sad and my thinking was that the reason for their expression was the whole sad moments that just passed until they spread the bad news of Aunty Sade's death. "Which aunty Sade,  my sister asked? She just came here and asked to use our toilet (she wiped tears off her face with the back of her hand)", "infact she is in the toilet" I said nervously. My dad hurriedly opened the toilet door, I have never seen the toilet this empty, I screamed.

I started turning, that was how I woke up. And behold!!! It was a dream plus we don't have any Aunty Sade not to talk of Sile in our lives, no house-help, no gateman. I prayed, covered my household with the blood of Jesus, closed my eyes and went back to sleep.

Minding your Business does not include Shunning Others

This is just going to be short and precise. As we all know that we are in a generation of minding our various businesses; so clearly, no one wants to be caught meddling in another person's issues no matter how close they claim to be to the person. Well, that is absolutely fine and acceptable. But come to think of it,  have you ever thought about it this way, that a friend of yours might particularly need your advice on some certain personal issues and if you are not available to state your opinion at that very moment (claiming to be minding your so called business), it means you are not a good friend.

I have these two friends, they do not know each other from Adam but they behave so alike. Normal you would say, but when it is a negative trait, I do not think it is normal in any way. What am I talking about? You see these my friends, they are always claiming to be minding their businesses to the extent that they give me some kind of "shut-up" answers (like "Ok that is good" after you have explained the history of your life), whenever I am trying to explain a particular situation I am passing through and I think it is very unfair. Yes, I have tried telling them that, "look, when I ask you for an advice, it is no longer my business, it is now Our Business" but these girls are not planning to change.

I am therefore using this write up to reach out to people that have friends like this/friends that behave like this. Your friend needs your advice that is why she is asking you. Stop shunning her. You can only back off when your friend makes it clear that her personal life is her business, then, she is already plain about the fact that she does not want anyone meddling in her affairs. I am not using "Him" here because most guys do not behave like this, they talk alot to one another. The issue lies among the ladies. Let us change!!!

How do you Treat People?

Most of the time we all want people to treat us the way we would treat them but the truth of the matter is that, "how many of us treat people right?" To buttress my point, let me share this story. I went for a Make-Up job around late last month. On getting there, I met another makeup artist (let me explain, it was an event center so any celebrant was allowed to come with their own makeup artist).

So I walked up to this Make-Up artist,  introduced myself with all purity of heart as a fellow Make-up artist who would be working alongside with her at the event center. You need to see the way this lady reacted like I was a low-life coming to beg at the party. She did not even return my kind gesture in the least way by just telling me her name. Well, later on I saw that she came with a car of her own and she probably thought I was not as good as she was in that field because I did not come with a car but I mean, we could still meet some other day and my first impression about her was already messed up.

Another scenario a friend told me about happened when she went to buy foodstuffs about four streets to her street (in her area). She said she is not familiar with the people there, so, she normally pass by quietly each time she has a business there. This particular day, she visited a store on that street. On getting there, she discovered the money she wanted to use to buy foodstuffs had somehow disappeared. She then decided to trace the money back the way she had come. On getting to a house close by, she saw a woman who was sitting in front of the house with her kids and they were all looking at each other in a strange way but she didn't mind and kept moving towards the main market. Suddenly, she recollected that she did not pass through the main market on her way to the store so she decided to retrace her steps and continue her search for the money in the direction of the store.

Lo and behold!!! As she turned back, she saw the mother of the kids she saw earlier bend over the money with the intention of keeping it in her waistcoast. A lot of things immediately flipped through her mind in a matter of seconds ranging from the fact that the woman and her kids actually saw the money fall in the first place to the fact that she watched her suffer in frustration all the time she was looking for the money without saying a word. After listening to this story, the only thing that came to my mind was "how do we treat people? ", I mean,  "how has this woman taught her kids to treat people via her own behaviour?"

Treating people bad especially for no reason at all is simply wickedness (of the highest order). Why would we even choose to be bad and ill-mannered when we can be good and as sweet as a rose. It sure does not cause a thing to be good natured. Infact being bad is costlier. Look at someone who has friends that do not support and would never support any of his/her hustle. Support does not necessarily mean you have to pay all or part of the bills,  you just have to be positive, help do the promotion of that your friend in the little way you can, tell people about him or her, you never can tell, you might tell people that will tell people who would assist that your friend.

Do not be selfish!!! Remember you are helping yourself by helping your friend. Besides, if we all keep doing that for one another, everyone of us would surely get help in our various fields (it is a circular thing, it evolves round and round) plus the saying "one good turn deserves another" perfectly describes my point.

Be wise, treat people nicely...

Love or Obsession?

I cried and cried the day his girlfriend called to threaten me to leave her boyfriend alone not only because that was the first time somebody would accuse me of something so disgusting but because I knew I could not stop loving him despite the threat. If you would ask me, I strongly believe that leaving a guy you love very much because his girlfriend threatened you to leave him can be as painful as/be likened to switching off a ceiling fan that is giving you so much pleasure just because the person sitting next to you is cold.

In my own words, love is that uncontrollable feeling that makes you feel hot and cold at the same time of which the object of your love is the only one that can normalize your condition. But come to think of it, this thing called love does not appear clear at times because most times, obsession is usually confused for love. For instance, in a situation whereby you can not sleep without this person,  you would  weep like a baby each time this person promised to show up but never did or even when he or she acts so coldly towards you over the phone,  via a text message or physically. Now do we call all of these love or obsession? That is where the confusion sets in.

Let me continue with the narration of my life experience, this guy I was brooding over was someone I met long before he had a girlfriend and long before I had a boyfriend  too but the courage to speak to him led me forgetting about him, I felt I could never be the first to start talking to a guy not to talk of telling him how I felt so I moved on with my life.

Few years later,  coincidence brought us together  as our paths crossed.  Although I kind of forced it in the sense that I searched and searched various social media outlets and kept asking people until l got his contact. We started talking and became so close plus it was all fun (at last I got what I had always wanted even though we both now had relationship partners). We saw nothing wrong in maintaining that closeness as far as we could always be together. The funny thing was that we were not even dating. My boyfriend (who far away from where I was because of work) began to suspect me one way or the other, my friends warned me and even his girlfriend started complaining to him about his divided attention which all led to the day his girlfriend called me. oh!  I have never been so embarrassed in my whole life but this guy and I still continued enjoying our togetherness despite all that happened (well I never told him about his girlfriend’s call because she threatened me not to, not like I was scared but somethings are better left that way). We were very intimate that oneday we were so carried away that he kissed me and well, I allowed it but we both later agreed that it would never happen again and that we were just friends but we were still so cool with each other after that.

All of a sudden, this guy began to withdraw from me, act so cold during a phone conversation and I felt like my life was ending. I would often cry my eyes out everyday until oneday I mustered the courage to speak up to my boyfriend about all that has happened and how it had been eating me all up. Oh! My boyfriend has a heart of gold, with his beautiful soul,  he was able to forgive me and made me understand that I was only obsessed about this guy and it was not love in the first place. My boyfriend came over to where I was at that time, he built this closeness and trust with me so much that I forgot about the guy after a while and I just could not thank my boyfriend enough.
What happened to the guy? We are still friends till date (no strings attached ofcourse) because he came back giving lame excuses for his actions and even asked me to be his girlfriend officially and I plainly said “NO”. In little words, all I am trying to say is that, try to differentiate if a feeling is of love or of obsession before acting on it. I learnt my lesson.

What I think about very Caring Guys Versus What Others think!!!

Most of the time, we confuse very caring guys to be the perfect kind of men God created.  Not that it is not good for a guy to be caring (at least most ladies love guys that care very much) but there is this thing that seems fake about guys that care too much and I wonder if I am the only one that sees these things. Maybe you would understand better this way;

I met this guy few months ago in an official gathering (more like a conference though). He stole my number while we were all struggling to do our entry registration at the gate and I never noticed. How did I know he stole my number?  Well he told me after we got close. We were literally everywhere together, holding hands during lunch breaks and anyone could easily think we came to the summit together as a couple plus he never let me out of his sight at any slight opportunity he gets to be with me.

Ofcourse,  I was not so cunny and I intended our interaction to be simply based on friendship basis (afterall, the conference would end soon and I was also enjoying his company) so, I told him I had a fiance back home. Well, he was truthful enough to tell me that he used to have a girlfriend but they are no longer together because she fumbled and I did not press further.

This guy did not make his intention hidden on how he would have cared/showered love on me if I was his girlfriend and when my menstrual period came during this conference, he would always make sure I had eaten, I had used some painkiller drugs, offer me jacket whenever I get stained. In summary,  he was all shades of sweetness and I was enjoying it. Lest I forget to add, he never hid the fact about how he would kiss/touch me if we ever happened to be alone so he would always beg me to allow us lodge in an hotel few more days after the summit. He would twist/scratch my palm in public at times and I would feel some kind of electric shock.

Finally,  three weeks came and the official summit/conference was over. This guy was still on my neck to allow us lodge in an hotel for few more days on the last day so I gave in at last. All these while, I would always be very aggressive towards my fiance on phone and he would wonder what was wrong with me so much that I screamed at him on phone oneday that he was choking me.

I lodged in the hotel with this new guy whom I barely knew and the funniest thing was that I paid for the first night with my very own money (I did not see anything wrong with it then though). Do not let me forget to tell you that this guy would often misplace his money during the conference period and I would be the one to make ends meet for him with my own money and even pay for his lunch and dinner sometimes. However, he paid for the second night at the hotel.

So,  what happened on the first night? That was how we landed on the bed o, this guy claimed to be scared to touch me so I was sleeping when he suddenly started bringing his hands, he kissed me, I was reluctant to return the kiss (my conscience just kept calling my fiance’s name) but I did return the kiss at last. He was about to touch my boobs and blah!!!  My phone suddenly rang, it was my fiance calling and my hearts skipped like ten beats faster, I quickly switched off my phone and turned my back against this guy (thinking about what I was about to do).

Despite the fact that I was sweating under the air condition with all that happened, I still allowed this touch and the rest was history (no sex though). Gradually, the three days lodging became over and we returned back to our normal lives in our various locations. I returned back to my fiance but he started feeling so insecure because I could not stop calling/picking this other guy’s call and my fiance and I would always disagree because of this guy all of the time.

All of a sudden, this new guy became so broke (well, that was what he told me). He turned from all shades of sweetness to something I could not describe. I would pray for him that things would be better and he would reject my prayers (things my fiance would never do). He would complain about sickness all the time and how he does not have money to treat himself and I would be so worried because I did not have money to send to him. He was so bitter and always in bad moods that I gradually began to see his true colour. I hustled and got some cash then sent to him (but I told him that I borrowed him the money even though I had no intention of collecting it back). Like magic, this guy returned back to his sweet self and we continued our friendship.

I expected this guy to return my money after few days like he promised but he did not o. I then decided to ask few weeks after just to see his reaction. He gave so many lame excuses and kept on giving me lame excuses till I tired. He stopped calling, texting and I began to wonder what I was doing with this guy in the first place. I started feeling guilty so I confessed everything that happened to my fiance. He forgave me and we moved on with our lives. Well, this guy resurfaced later giving his usual dumb excuses like how his phone got stolen, how he went tirelessly in search of my number and how he wants us to hook up again but all in all, I was so done with him even though we still talk once in a while. Very caring guys are not worth it abeg.

Suicide!!!

I have always wondered why a very lively and happy person would suddenly become very quiet and withdrawn. You know I used to feel no problem of this world is worth the use of one's happiness as an atonement for peace until I met this friend of mine (at the studio where I usually rehearse). Oh!  This girl was so full of joy, fun to be with so much that you can never be sad or bored whenever you are around her. She would even often make advances to me on behalf of her elder brother (all jokes though). All am trying to say is that she was a very nice person in everyway and we became friends in no time. Until when the story changed about two years after I got to know this lady.

It all started out as she missing rehearsals, switching off her phone every now and then and making excuses from time to time about how she could not/would not be able to meet up with our various time to meet for rehearsals. I did not even notice anything owing to the fact that she was always full of smiles and warmth each time I had the opportunity to come across her. I decided to visit her often to know if anything was actually wrong and she was not telling me (probably I could see for myself) but everything seemed as it should be so I reduced the visit so she does not feel choked and continued with my normal life.

Just three months later, I was called and informed that she gave up the ghost (committed suicide properly put). I was told that she drank a chemical solution meant for killing dangerous reptiles and she died on the way as she was being rushed to the hospital. After so much tears and weeping, I began to ponder on why she never told anyone what she was going through. At a point, I even started feeling guilty that I did not pressure her enough to talk but I mean, I tried😑.

People started saying all manner of things like; maybe she was depressed, maybe she was pregnant and did not know who to tell or better still committed an abortion and lost her womb. Well, nobody knows for sure what happened but my point here is directed to the fact that there are some components that needs to be showered vast attention before it heightens to depression. We can say, "depression" is an umbrella word for these components but believe me, these components are umbrella words themselves (they can individually and single-handedly kill a person/make a person commit suicide).

You would ask me what these components are right? Well, those things we treat on the surface level and with very much insignificance like spreading bad words about a person's moral, that is, demoralizing a human being like you with the words of your mouth, another one is, breaking the heart/trust of someone whose life depends on you whether in a relationship or in a friendship (and some people think all this is a joke...). However, some people will say, "why would your life be depended on the trust you have for someone in the first place?" , well as true as this statement may be, the fact remains that there are still people out there who trust you to the bone whether they tell you or not...

No one knows why this young promising female committed suicide in the above write-up but all the same, let us adjust our crooked ways. Let us love again, let us trust again, let us hold back hurt/revenge and lend our helping hands to others, let us breath forgive...We never can tell, we might be saving someone's life...Shalom!!!